Are You a Leader or a Ruler?
By Les Taylor
A friend and I had a discussion this past weekend about the difference between being a leader and being a ruler. While I'll admit the discussion had a definite political bent, it did cause me to consider the differences. I decided to do a little homework and see what I could find regarding both titles. I started with definitions. A leader is person who leads or commands a group, organization, or country. A ruler exercises dominion. While those descriptions are interesting, I think the primary distinction between the two is that a leader has the ability to influence - both people and outcomes. People follow leaders because they trust them. And they trust them because they believe in their ability to reach an intended goal or outcome. They trust them because they believe a leader has their best interests at heart. But, I think there are some other distinctive differences between the two. Here's my take on the difference between a leader and a ruler 1. Leaders influence - Rulers demand: Demanding that certain actions be taken a certain way almost always leads to resentment. No one wants to be told what to do, how to do it or when to do it - especially today. Dictates and demands make us feel powerless, and this leads to resentment. If you're looking for mediocrity and a half-hearted effort, just demand something be done - without asking for input from those affected by the edict. Leaders look for input. They want to know what others are thinking and they're always looking for better ideas and new ways of doing things. A leader doesn't fear a different opinion and doesn't consider someone who disagrees an enemy. 2. Leaders are transparent - Rulers... not so much: No one likes to think something is being hidden from them. When things aren't going well or mistakes have been made, it's always a good policy to simply admit it. Don't make excuses and don't make stuff up. Admit things aren't working out as planned and get input on how to fix the problem. Someone once said: "None of us is as smart as all of us." I'm not sure who to attribute that quote to but my guess is it was a leader. 3. Leaders listen - Rulers aren't interested in other ideas or opinions: You've heard that fifty percent of being a good communicator is being a good listener? I think being a good communicator means listening more than fifty percent of the time. Leaders want to know what's (really) going on - they don't assume they know. A good leader also wants to hear differing opinions. Rulers have their own agenda and don't really care what others think. They're not looking for advice or opinion. They're looking for compliance. 4. Leaders focus on the positive - Rulers are faultfinders: Leaders encourage. They provide hope, support and confidence by maintaining a positive, encouraging attitude. We all want to know our efforts are appreciated and we all need positive reinforcement - especially when things aren't going well. Rulers are finger-pointers. It's not about seeing what's working, it's about pointing the finger and blaming. Rulers rule through fear mongering and faultfinding. 5. Leaders play to the strengths of others - Rulers don't: Leaders surround themselves with people who have the strengths they personally lack. A good leader doesn't try to be a Jack (or Jill) of all trades. Leaders focus on their specific strengths and avoid trying to strengthen their weaknesses. Leaders delegate the things they don't do well to those who have the necessary skills to achieve positive results. Rulers have a false sense of their own abilities. They believe they're where they are because of who they are - and grossly overestimate their abilities. There you have it, my take on the difference between a leader and a ruler. It seems pretty obvious which of the two will lead effectively and create positive outcomes. Leaders are influential, transparent, good listeners, who focus on the positive, and play to the strengths of others. Rulers, on the other hand, rely on position and power to get their followers (subjects) to do what they want them to do. They're not interested in differing opinions or input. Rulers are self-focused and, in their world, the ends justify the means Given the choice, you want to be a people-focused leader.
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